Counselor Referral Policy

Does Stone Gate Resources maintain a referral list?

Unfortunately, we do not maintain an official referral list. Our first recommendation is that you consider attending our Biblical Intensive Counseling Workshop.

Our second recommendation is that you use the resources on this site.

Third, we encourage you to speak with people who have benefited from a particular biblical counselor, or to ask the pastor or elders of a Bible-believing church for a recommendation. The following guidelines may help you wisely choose a biblical counselor.

  1. A biblical counselor should be a person:
    • Who genuinely cares about people, who knows how to persevere through tough times and strongly believes that God can change people in all situations.
    • Who believes that God’s Word is designed and capable of providing sufficient wisdom for all of life’s problems.
    • Who gives clear evidence of being a true believer and who bears fruit in his/her own life.
  2. As you begin your search, pray for wisdom, knowing that God cares for His children and wants to work in your heart and life. Seek the counsel from your church leaders and wise Christian friends. Seek counsel outside your church, if necessary. And finally, use the following section to make a wise decision.

Choosing a Christian Counselor

If possible, ask the prospective counselor the following questions over the phone before scheduling an appointment. Otherwise, discuss them at your first appointment.

  • What is your approach to counseling? How do you understand the problem of sexual sin? Is it a disease or is it sin? Is a sexual sinner a “sexual addict” for life, or can they become a new creature in Christ?
  • How does counseling help people change and grow? Describe the process.
  • What books have you read on the subject of sexual addiction? What books have most influenced your counseling approach and your understanding of the subject of sexual addiction? What books do you recommend on a regular basis?
  • How long have you been a counselor? How long have you been counselor individuals who struggle with sexual addiction or their spouses? How many cases have you handled?
  • How do you bring biblical truth into your counseling practice? What role does scripture play?
  • What is your educational and professional background? What role does it play?
  • Are you married? Do you have children? Have you ever been divorced? How does your marriage and family situation affect how you counsel people?
  • What is your position on divorce? Do you recommend divorce in cases of heart and/or physical adultery?

All counseling is an interactive process. Trust is essential, so open and honest dialogue is critical. Establish trust early on, or you may need to look for another counselor.